I spent most of the morning thinking of a clever analogy for this review, one that would both playfully endorse yet caution the unschooled masses of horror fans with Terry West’s hit & miss 2003 film FLESH FOR THE BEAST. It’s like an ugly slut hitting on you at the bar; only your degree of drunkenness will determine how much you’ll enjoy what happens next.
The film offers all the break-beats any horror fan can slamdance to with reckless abandon, but then you realize it’s still the techno music equivalent of genre film making. The film opens with a whole slaughter of bullets and blood spray and not much explanation of what else. Cue the titles and then this is where the story kicks in. Apparently the gore we witnessed was a team of paranormal investigators wandering around a Gothic mansion and now an eccentric millionaire has hired a new team to pick up here the others bled out. This mansion has quite the past as a brothel haunted by apparitions and other scares and it’s up to the crackerjack team of cliches to solve this tit filled Scooby Doo mystery. This millionaire has a dark secret as well. Seems the prostitutes turned demons that inhabit this humble abode feed on human flesh and it’s up to Daddy Warbucks to keep them in fresh supply, hence calling in the ghetto Ghostbusters. All along he’s also looking for an ancient amulet that supposedly has control over his harpies that’s hidden somewhere in the house. I could offer a character breakdown of the team members, but there’s no real point. One’s no nonsense and wants to leave, another is the tech guru, one’s a psychic, and I’m just tired writing about it already.
The quality of acting comes straight out of what you’d expect community college to deliver. It’s really an awkward dance of dialogue and gun-play until faces start getting ripped off and boobies start popping out. The seduction scenes are out and out laughable, playing like late night Cinemax dinner theater. You could read a bit of a feminist undertone into the ending of maternity and sisterhood triumphing, but I think that’s giving it all a bit too much credit. I do have to say that the actresses blend a subtle resonance with their feminine wiles and their demonic hunger. The fellows offer yet another reason to keep it in your pants when there’s people dying around you.
Basically this flick is exactly what you’d expect from Terry West who’s given the world SATAN’S SCHOOL FOR LUST, VAMPIRE QUEEN, and LORD OF THE G-STRINGS: FEMALESHIP OF THE STRING, so going into this viewing you really shouldn’t be surprised by what you find. You never really know whether or not to believe if his efforts are serious. All in all this movie is like bad pizza made by a friend. Sure, it’s easy to complain about it, but you should probably bite your tongue and enjoy what they did do right with another long swig of booze. It’s digested easily enough and just as easily forgotten as blood-dipped junk food cinema should be. This picture show is what you’d expect and silently encourage your 12 year old brother to watch, as he stays up late UP ALL NIGHT with Rhonda Shear if that was still around. Then you hopefully school him on the tastier offerings of blood splatter horror like a proper sibling. Teach ’em young, they’re the future.