Boobs, blood, and…bros? Yep, that’s right. We’ve seen massacres of many types before: Texas Chainsaw ones, Slumber Party ones, Nail Gun ones, Vibrator ones-all types. So, it was a matter of time before somebody was just big enough of a smartass to kill a bunch of idiots set to the backdrop of one of the most gluttonous, embarrassing annual humiliations we have attached to the human race. But as a self-respecting human being, it’s hard not to laugh your ass off at this sucker as you see these jag offs get knocked off in a gruesome fashion.
I’m guessing that by reading the title, you’ve pretty much figured out what this flick is all about. Well, you’re right. While a bunch of bra-challenged young ladies have a lil’ sleepover (or a “slumber party” *wink*), a convicted serial killer is on the loose and ready to kill. Thankfully, these young ladies have that college edu-mah-cation going for them, because they have to solve this mystery before everyone is dead. I’d continue on with explaining the plot, but why ruin the twists and turns?
Spring Break Massacre is a flat-out, entertaining movie. Clearly the folks making this movie had their tongues stapled into their cheeks. They pull no punches or ever try and take themselves seriously. Each character is more obnoxious than the next and the film allows you the chance to cheer for deaths, while siding with a good guy. There’s some awesome cameos by some 80’s horror legends (Reggie Bannister and Linnea Quigley) and plenty of cringe-worthy sex jokes to take you back to the good ol’ days. When watching SBM, one gets the distinct impression that this film was actually made by horror fans. They clearly knew what their audience wanted…and delivered on it. Sure, there’s plenty of the same trappings that a no-budget indie film is going to have but at the end of the day, this flick looks good and cuts to the chase with a strong sense of humor. Admittedly, we see so many indie flicks that come our way at The Blood Sprayer. While we admire the heart and the spirit of the independent filmmaker, it can be a taxing process of looking at some of these films and trying to find some good in them. Fortunately, Mike Hoffman’s film lays all its cards on the table and gives you something to smile at. There’s very little to second guess with it-it’s a slasher movie with all the expected concepts. The difference here being, during the heyday of the almighty slasher, those filmmakers were taking themselves waaaaay too seriously. These guys watched films like Pieces, Slumber Party Massacre, Killer Party, etc. and made their version, but knew they wanted to make it ridiculous. Truly, their were “serious” moments in the film (the cut backs from the action to the post-massacre crime scene dialogue) but for the most part, the film kept the off color jokes well balanced with the scares and gore. Don’t hunt Spring Break Massacre down looking for award-winning filmmaking. Hunt it down if you love some good ol’ fashioned camp. These guys made a great indie horror flick and show the ability to tackle a larger project down the road, but in the meantime we’ll get our smiles from this one.