Porn Star Gone Wrong: ‘Bloodlust Zombies’ Review

Porn Star Gone Wrong: ‘Bloodlust Zombies’ Review

I appreciate nudity as much as the next person (male or female) because it can be used in ways that can make a movie either more humorous or sexy. The inclusion of porn stars in movies such as Zombie Strippers proves that this can work when done right (and with a small budget). Bloodlust Zombies is a movie that tries to follow in the steps of the horror comedies with use of sex jokes and nudity but ultimately, even with a “good” concept, falls flat on its chest.

The premise is rather generic but if the film were executed well it could have saved itself total humiliation. There is a corporation (I didn’t care enough to find out their name) who after a big biological break, developed a chemical that will help win the “war”. I am not entirely sure what war they are talking about but now they are keen to party for a bit in the office for a job well done. Well, two careless lab technicians break the container in which the cat (who is infected with the virus) falls out and proceeds to bite an employee, which then leads to the complex locking itself up after the disaster. Think of the first Resident Evil film but without the fun or the Red Queen. Turns out the “virus” the company was making was going to be used to turn the enemy against each other with RAGE! Employees begin to band together and their only hope seems to rely on Alexis Texas’ character and her rough demeanor. With an underlying message of “workers unite” the movie tries to preach the horrors of weapon manufacturing, bureaucracy, and the idea that we are all just “lab rats”. With its overt preachy nature comes a lack of respect from me (this speaks more about me) because I prefer subtext, not being told what to think outright.

 

Let’s talk about the positive aspects of the film first because as much of a “negative Nancy” I have been, there were a few redeemable moments. The lab technicians have the best screen time of the movie with quick one liners and a tight dialogue script. I wish the humor was more off-handed and carefree like these guys but I guess the director had other ideas. There is a good amount of enjoyable gore and blood as well, with some nice arterial spray here and there and gunshots to the heads of zombies. There is one scene in particular where one of the characters stabs a zombie repeatedly with a glass beaker and with the beaker sticking in the zombie’s chest; it fills to the top with blood. Not amazing in any sense but they were thinking outside the box on that one.

As to what makes the movie far outweighs what makes the movie good (as if you didn’t already know). The inclusion of Alexis Texas (she is a porn star) makes the statement that this film will be about sex and nudity. It is but every time there is a raunchy scene it feels contrived and only wanting to please some sort of idiotic demographic. It usually has nothing to do with the story and feels as if they are trying to get a laugh. One scene has a perverted character approached by a nude zombie and he gets the cliché “devil and angel on his shoulder” bit. The angel is telling him to shoot her because she is a zombie and the devil trying to get him to sleep with her. It’s not funny! Stop it! Alexis is not even as nude as much as you think she would be, in fact I think this movie would have been better as a porno. The humor is poor, the acting is bad, and the messages of anti-corporate America are preachy and overused.

Stay away from this one people, it is infected with terrible everything. There are far better horror/sex comedies out there that you can watch and still have a good time. Bloodlust Zombies feels more like a porno without the porn, as if it had been edited for late night T.V. instead of including anything worthwhile.


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My name is Jesse Lee Alan Bartel and I love being a critic on things you don't care about. I love films, horror, writing, and violent video games. Hope to hear from you and happy stabbings. I am also a regular contributor to The Liberal Dead.

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